Laughing Along With A Limerick

Here’s to a great new week! Your new limerick challenge is as follows:


Your challenge last week was to write a limerick using the word LEAD in it somewhere. Here are your masterpieces:

Keith Channing:

I think that we all are agreed,
I’ll follow wherever you lead
We could wind up dead
From petrol with lead
So stick to your velocipede!

Ruth Scribbles:

As the crowd was watching the race
Someone screamed, “That man, he’s got mace”
He ran for a spell
Lead feet don’t do well
He didn’t have mace he had lace.

Kim Smyth:

I once had a horse on a lead
Walking him out in the weed
He then stomped some dust
“Back to the stall or bust!”
I said, for it was time to feed.

Christine Mallaband-Brown:

The choirmaster said take the lead,
You sing well and that’s what we need.
So I sang like a lark
With a very bad bark!
I’m out of the choir for that deed!

Trent’s World:

Bob’s advice was hard to swallow
His words rang awfully hollow
Show the way
I must say
Lead and I shall follow.

The words were a big fight
I’d erase and then rewrite
The paper bled
Pencil lead
And still the prose was quite trite.

Lance Greenfield:

Bony Tony had lead in his pencil.
He could write a story without need of a stencil.
With language quite glossy
And often right saucy,
His hot tales were deeply sensual.

Richmond Road:

Life’s a race, and I’m far from the lead
Left behind in my hour of need
My spirit is breakin’
I’m feeling forsaken
I’m determined. But lacking in speed.

Laying here holding my head
My legs are so heavy – feel like lead
My heart it is thumping
In it’s last go at pumping
I’m alive, but I wish I was dead.

Val Fish:

I trust in the Lord to lead the way
In everything that I do and say
When it comes to lust
I do what I must
Just have a cold shower and pray.


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23 Responses to Laughing Along With A Limerick

  1. Kim Smyth says:

    There once was a man with a boil
    Caused by hours of toil
    He lanced the darn thing
    Which caused such a sting!
    Then, on his pillows he did coil!

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Popeye’s special friend, Olive Oyl,
    Developed a massive great boil
    Like one of her toes
    Had grown from her nose;
    It even made Bluto recoil!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. I put three eggs on to boil
    And with heat the water did roil
    Two slices of toast
    Best butter to boast
    But napkins made out of tin foil?!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. My finger had a huge great boil
    From gardening, caused by the soil
    I started to weep
    As it began to seep
    To heal it? That was a long toil!

    Liked by 2 people

  5. trentpmcd says:

    Our recession menu is a fright
    Boiled cabbage, every night!
    Nary a sweet
    Nor any meat
    A forced diet when money is tight

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Oh BOIL, oh BOIL, oh BOIL
    he’s angry and like a gargoyle
    he sits there and fumes
    without eating his legumes
    he’d rather they rot and just spoil

    Liked by 2 people

  7. “Lance that boil!” the doctor said.
    Responded I, “Go boil your head!”
    “T’won’t hurt,” lied she,
    As she stabbed with glee.
    It made me cry! My tears were shed.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. TanGental says:

    Trainee nurse Christopher Tick
    Was as mustard keen as he was thick.
    When told to prick Colin Doyle’s
    Large and aggressive buttock boil,
    He, instead, heated water and boiled his…

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Pingback: A saucy postcard and a Limerick | TanGental

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