Laughing Along With A Limerick

Here’s your Monday smile – it’s limerick time. Send in your own or here’s a prompt for you –

CHEESE

Here are a few limericks to make you smile this Monday. The prompt last week was MOP.

Keith Channing:

My soufflé’s a bit of a flop,

To clear it I needed a mop.

It rose for a while

Which caused me to smile,

But that’s how it ended – kerplop!

Kim Smyth:

If it’s a mop you be wielding

Better start with the floor, then the ceiling

To have a clean house

Leave no crumbs for a mouse

Then proud is how you’ll be feeling!

Christine Mallaband-Brown:

There is a folly called Mow Cop

I had to clean up with a Mop

Its found above Cheshire

And it got much messier

When crows started sitting on top!

Paul Mastaglio:

There’s so much mess

Causing me stress

I’ve been caught on the hop

I can’t find me mop

And this rhyme is utterly useless!

Trent’s World:

“Mop” they called the hair with disdain

And they thought the music quite insane

But the band won hearts

Rose to the top of the carts

And the “Best Ever” the Beatles remain.

The Hidden Edge:

Geraldine woke up in a strop,

Suggested she needed a swap,

I’m bored in the kitchen …

Wife; do stop your bitchin,

You mow the lawn; I’ll take mop!

Ritu:

You look just like a mop

With your hair all a-flop

You need a good cut

Your mother, she’ll tut

While looking from bottom to top.

Lance Greenfield:

There once was a boss, Jurgen Klopp,

Well known for his terrible strops.

When players did fail,

He’d hand them a pail,

Yelling, “Here’s your new job. Use that mop!”

Sarian Lady:

Outside with my bucket and mop,

Startled, I heard a loud plop.

To my great surprise,

In front of my eyes.

A frog jumped out with a flop.

Sharon Tingle:

From mud, my first doll was made in my little toy shop.

It was adorable, albeit a dirt flop.

Later one, I got the likes of Cabbage Patch and rag dolls.

Alas, my aged Raggedy Ann, head to the side now lolls

Looks like a red mop without a prop.

Linking People 2003:

ALKALINE bicarbonate in the blood,

Helps to mop the excess acid flood.

Though, lemon juice is acidic,

Benefits in heartburn is terrific.

Quarter litre water with a tablespoon juice as food.

***

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61 Responses to Laughing Along With A Limerick

  1. I say, here’s a jolly good wheeze,
    A jape fit for us retirees.
    Let’s see if these mice
    Will do something nice,
    If we give them some smelly French cheese.

  2. Paul Mastaglio says:

    Smile please
    Relax, don’t freeze
    You’ll be fine, Kate
    All ready for your big date
    So, for the camera, say cheese!

    Cheers Paul 😁

  3. Linkingpeople2003 says:

    ….EXTERNALLY applied cheese nourishes skin!

    ….CHEESE cream applied skin shines!

    ….SAY, “Cheese!” for radiating selfie!

    ….GRASS fed animals better cheese!

  4. I’ll write this limerick if you please
    About the smell on the breeze
    It’s olfactory delight
    Is an odour of might!
    Stinking Bishop, a very strong Cheese!

  5. Linkingpeople2003 says:

    SELENIUM of cheese good for hair and skin,
    Fat, protein, calcium and vitamin,
    Zinc, phosphorus, Omega-3, fatty acids, riboflavin replenish.
    When externally applied, mops skin blemish.
    If spoilt, apply to skin, not throw to bin!

  6. Kim Smyth says:

    There once was a chap who ate cheese
    Upon thereafter he would sneeze
    It seemed to his friends
    He’d give it up in the end
    But no! He said, “More, if you you please!”

  7. Debbie and her sister Louise,
    Were as different as chalk and cheese,
    One shy and retiring,
    One always aspiring,
    But both have the most knobbly knees!

  8. Pingback: – (Monday Limerick#48) – Laura McHarrie @ The Hidden Edge

  9. Ritu says:

    Oh, Jonny, you’re such tease
    No, really. Stop it, please
    Our pairing’s not fated
    You’re sounding quite dates
    Quite honestly, I’ve never head so much cheese

  10. ‘I only have to say the word ‘cheese,’
    My labrador rolls off the couch with ease
    You would think I hadn’t fed her.
    As she drools under the cheddar.
    And lifts up her paw to say ‘please’.

  11. trentpmcd says:

    Please say “cheese” when I snap
    You with this funny phone app
    Beauty it makes
    Of all it takes
    Even when you look like crap

    Not that anyone who will read this ever looks like crap, but I’m sure the app-makers will make a mint for some Instagramers…

  12. “Avez-vous de bons fromages en France?”
    “Bien sûr, Monsieur. Les meilleurs du monde!”
    “Stilton? Wensleydale? Kings among cheeses!”
    “Ooh là là! You English. Such teases!
    But we agree. D’accord! Of cheese, we’re fond.”

    • That’s so clever! Thanks, Lance.

      • It’s based on a true story. My boss at a French company, who was from Huyton but had lived in France for decades and spoke excellent French with a Liverpool accent, took me to some of the best restaurants in Paris and Cote d’Azur. He often good-hearted enjoyed banter with the waiters and this was one of his favourite jokes: to ask if they had any decent cheese and counter the response with a request for the best English cheeses. It was perfect for your ‘Cheese’ limerick challenge.

  13. Pingback: Cheese? Please! | A Once & Future Recluse

  14. There was a young farmer from Cheddar,
    Who fancied a girl called Jane Pedder.
    He went down on one knee,
    Promising limitless cheese.
    She screamed, “YES!” and he went on to wed her.

  15. Pingback: Random Limericks 29 – Keith Kreates!

  16. Sharon Tingle says:

    The villain would have escaped free
    Had he not stopped to pocket some brie.
    Angry claws ripped at his elbow
    Causing his deadly free-fall through a window.
    While Happy the cat, snatched the cheese with glee.

  17. Sharon Tingle says:

    Thank you Esther. Hope you had a great weekend.

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