Laughing Along With A Limerick

Here’s your Monday smile – it’s limerick time. Send in your own or here’s a prompt for you –

GLUE

Here are a few limericks to make you smile this Monday. The prompt was MAD:

Keith Channing:

They suggested I must be a chump

To admit that I’ve got a real hump

I said, “I’m not mad,

Just terribly sad.

At the thought of four more years of Trump.”

Paul Mastaglio:

Lockdown ain’t all bad,

Gives you time for a new fad,

It could even make you smile,

At least for a while,

Until you’re driven stark raving mad.

Christine Mallaband-brown:

The noise is incredibly bad

– they bought drums for the young lad.

The noise from next door

Is making my head sore!

And it’s absolutely driving me mad!

Trent’s World:

Reading the news makes me mad

Some of our leaders are awfully bad!

They haven’t a wit

Morals? Not one bit

The shape of our world is pretty sad.

*

She was mad as a March hare

Romping around without a care

Until, in her mirth

She was dressed as at birth

And was arrested for being bare.

*

My love for you is more than deep

Mad and passionate in a heap

But you care not

For my sorry lot

And seem to think I’m a creep…

Lyncrain:

Once there was a strange man who was mad

He may even have behaved quite bad

Rumors flew, like wildfire

the children he did sire

making his wife quite bitter and sad.

Ritu:

There was a young man from Baghdad

Who lived in fear of his dad

For girls weren’t his thing

Boys made his heart sing

His father would go totally mad!

Kim Smyth:

A girl always dressed for the fad

Which made her poor mom really mad

The girl wanted to wear black

Putting mom on the attack

So she burnt all her clothes, which was sad.

Geoff Le Pard:

‘My life’s so dull,’ said Sir Galahad,

‘Being seen as good is driving me mad.

All of this adulation,

Has given me constipation.

In future I will present as a cad.’

Rhen Laird:

Much as I applaud her beauty, Moon can drive me mad

And leave me lachrymose, despairing, oh so very sad…

But as a poet, I’m drawn to her penultimate allure

Compelled, yearning, piteous, begging silver’d tincture…

Thus, soonest she’s filled to brim, finished thrashing my mortal soul—I’m glad.

***

Fun Quotes About Life In General: Life Inspirational Quotes Funny ...
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33 Responses to Laughing Along With A Limerick

  1. Darlene says:

    Some clever limericks here!

  2. Ritu says:

    Little Pete didn’t know what to do
    He found himself in a bit of a stew
    His wig wouldn’t stick
    Then he thought of a trick
    And smothered his bald pate with glue

  3. My wife sent me out for some glue,
    Where to buy it, I hadn’t a clue.
    I walked past a pub,
    Stepped into a club
    And downed a hot toddy or two.

  4. Kim Smyth says:

    Not sure I can top Ritu’s but here’s mine:

    There once was a woman named Sue
    Who found she was in need of glue
    When tape wouldn’t hold
    She tried syrup; quite bold!
    She knew not what else she could do!

  5. trentpmcd says:

    There once was a girl named Sue
    Who stuck to Bill like glue
    When he asked why
    She started to cry
    “Because I love you!”
    *
    There once was a boy named Sid
    Who always wore a cool lid
    It stayed on like glue
    Even when the wind blew
    So nobody saw the bald spot it hid
    *
    There was a dog name Lucky
    Who was very cute and plucky
    ’til he spilled the glue jar
    And spread it near and far
    Now he seems pretty yucky

  6. Mr Paul L Mastaglio says:

    Hi Esther,

    I got stuck with the theme, glue, Didn’t know what to do, So I thought to myself, There’s a book on that shelf, That’ll probably give me a clue.

    Cheers Paul 😀

  7. I’m trying to learn something new,
    But I can’t remember what’s true?
    I’m very confused
    And a bit bemused
    Need facts to stick in my mind, like glue!

  8. TanGental says:

    There are those that have called her heinous
    To detach, with one blow, her bloke’s penis.
    But when later she threw it
    So back he’d not glue it
    Well, many have said, ‘What a genius.‘

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